My darling son is not a great sleeper, he will fight with all his might to stay awake and has been known to allow me less than two hours sleep during the night. It seems to have been decided, (although I wasn't invited to the meeting), that I will do all of the nightly feeding/cuddling/changing and for that reason I set up camp downstairs on the sofa. Yes, our front room is not only a small zoo but also a nursery at the moment. Now, the official reason for this is that my partner is working and needs his sleep but I would like to share with you the real reason.
Picture the scene for a moment:
It's 2am, darling baby is screaming and I trudge downstairs to make up a bottle.....I wish I had been able to breastfeed. I perch, very uncomfortably, on the edge of our super-squishy matress and start to feed bubba. My head is bobbing about all over the place as I fight off sleep, (it really is a miracle that I haven't dropped him during the night), and my partner stirs. Does he check that we're ok? Does he hell! He rolls over as if to avoid being disturbed by our happy little party. Were I not holding a baby, it is at this moment that I would smash his face in. I really, really want to lash out at him and I can only put it down to sheer exhaustion coupled with a baby screeching in my earhole. Instead of smothering him with a pillow I sit downstairs, make a brew and put the telly on....ok, I usually have a sneaky bag of Wotsits too but I need the energy, (no wonder I still look pregnant)!!
I long to climb back into bed, (the sofa is extremely uncomfortable), but I fear that my mugshot may end up all over the news. NEW MUM BLUDGEONS SLEEPING PARTNER WITH A TOMMEE TIPPEE!
Alas, I fear I am destined to sleep on the sofa evermore......